While trying to sell his handsome English Tudor house, afinancial planner in his mid-50s experienced an extreme level ofanxiety. He feared his property wouldn't sell or that if it did, itwould go for less than he'd invested in it. Because of his angst, hespent several hours each day searching the Internet for updates onhis local real estate market. Also, each day he pestered his brokerfor news.
"All that anxiety hurt him from moving forward in a positiveway," recalls Mark Nash, the man's broker and author of "1001 Tipsfor Buying and Selling a Home."
Nash says the man's apprehensions clouded his reason, whichultimately undermined his sale. Why? Because in his emotionalturmoil, he insisted on setting a list price that Nash estimates wasat least 15 percent over his home's market value, which causedprospects to shun the property.
So after seven taxing months, the home hadn't sold and he removedit from the market.
"People's fears make them lose sight of realism. And that cancause them to act against their best interests," Nash says.
Mary McCall, a real estate broker affiliated with the Council ofResidential Specialists (www.crs.com), says seller anxieties aremore widespread now than at any point during her career.
She says homeowners who have little or no equity in theirproperty are especially nervous about selling.
Even after a buyer is found for a home, many owners obsess thattheir deal could fall through because of financing problems or thatthe purchaser's home inspector might discover repairs that couldprove costly.
"Buyers today are very nitpicky, and so sellers worry a lot aboutall the repairs and changes they may need to do to get the salethrough, like minor problems with the roof," McCall says.
It can be challenging for home sellers to stay calm in thecurrent real estate market.
But here are a few pointers that could help:
-- Don't listen to a chorus of opinions from the uninformed.
As many home sellers can attest, once a property goes on themarket, its owners often receive a large volume of unsolicitedadvice from neighbors, family members and friends.
They opine both on the pricing of the property and on how itshould be presented to the public.
But Nash cautions that taking too many opinions into account canjangle a seller's nerves, especially when the opinions come frompeople who lack expertise in real estate.
If you have questions or concerns about the information given toyou by your real estate agent, Nash recommends you seek a secondopinion from another professional in the field.
For example, you could ask for advice from the managing broker inthe same office where your agent works, or call an agent fromanother nearby office.
-- Create an action plan to help address your worries.
Therapists who assist clients in combating their anxiety oftenmake an unusual suggestion: Set aside a brief daytime period duringwhich you can worry actively.
In this "worry time," take pen to paper and itemize your fears.Then list the action steps you could take if your fears arerealized.
For example, perhaps you fear your home won't sell before youhave to make a long-distance move.
In that case, you might itemize steps you could take to convertyour place into a rental property, if only for a year or two.
Nash endorses the idea of home sellers creating a "what if" planto calm their minds.
"What you're doing is generating options for yourself. That wayyou'll have a greater sense of control over your destiny and youwon't feel hopeless," he says.
-- Avoid late night discussions about your home sale.
Many people who worry about selling a home allow the subject tospill over from daytime to evening hours and to interfere with theirsleep, according to Nash.
But he urges sellers to deal with the matter solely in thedaytime.
"Selling a house is a business proposition that should be handledsolely during business hours. Don't discuss it with your significantother during the late evening or it could cost you a good night'ssleep," Nash says.
Rather than tackling your real estate issues at night, Nashsuggests you engage in calming activities during your last "winddown" hour before bedtime.
This could include light reading, watching a funny movie or doinga crossword puzzle.
-- Consider a "timeout" approach to coping with your anxieties.
Nash says sellers should try to avoid letting their emotions rulewhen it comes to important decisions, such as setting theappropriate list price and deciding whether to take price cuts.
If you're suffering from a lot of anxiety about your sale, Nashurges you to take a systematic approach to stress management, suchas meditation, yoga or formal relaxation training.
"If you can break the stress for even 20 minutes each day, youcan come back to the issues with the freshness and focus that shouldincrease your chances for success in whatever you do," Nash says.
Ellen James Martin is a syndicated columnist. Contact her atellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.
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